Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

We *will* get Sugarfoot to the vet. She's probably just got a little mite infestation. She will be fine.

I *will* get my left ear fixed. I'm on antibiotics, I'm following the instructions, and I see the ENT on Monday. The day I stop suffering is coming soon.

We *will* be financially okay, even if the above are a bit pricey. I have nearly $850 in ready savings and Peg's Patreon is doing better than ever. (JOIN US! https://www.patreon.com/egypturnash)

I am really *good* at my job and even if my boss figures out I'm behind on hours, he appreciates my efforts and knows it's a rough year. My work quality and a clear plan for improvement *will* save my ass.

I *can* afford a goddamn pizza. I'm... I'm buying a goddamn pizza.

i can't even begin to understand what kind of big brain would lead a Biden supporter to see a list of famous American socialists including Albert Einstein, Helen Keller, and the author of the Pledge of Allegiance... assume it's coming from a Republican.. and attack it as some kind of "Trump won" rant.

okay, i can, but maybe this is a sign that we all, including me, need to take a deep breath, get away from Twitter for a long time, and think about what it's doing to our brains

or maybe i'll just relax and indulge in the fundamental attribution error just this once and assume he's a dumbass

FUN FACT: Due to a mild brain injury during my premature birth, I see little white sans-serif numbers floating over all of your heads.

Every time you post a meme, that number goes down by one. It's like Infinity Train, except for the slow demise of our culture. ^______________^

@Austin_Dern I see her like three times a year at most, so it's really the least of my stress right now. :) I just feel bad for my mom and stepdad (who are GREAT, and got vaxxed with enthusiasm, given they are old, enjoy not dying, and not ignorant as shit >_< ) trying to juggle visits with my nephews around my stepsister's crazy bullshit.

And it's just galling that the memetic disease has spread so fucking close to home. It's even MORE personal now. I can come right out and say it here: I'm about ready to split Marjorie Greene with a rusty axe. >____<

oh look it's my time in seattle except i was in my mid-30s

yay

oh did i mention my stepsister became an antivaxxer? 🙃​🙃​🙃​🙃

it's fine, we've never been close, and my parents are both vaccinated and kind of irritated at her-- they even banned her from family functions recently because THE DIPSHIT TESTED POSITIVE-- so it's fine

this is cold, but worst-case scenario, if she really wants to die for a bad cause, it's one less person to split the inheritance with. i already lost the stepsibling I LIKED. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

@anthracite (Or whatever your muse dictates of course <3 )

@anthracite Maybe do that plot review and help me fix stuff? <3

@001zlnv

*sigh*

@Phorm this was uncannily true to the genre btw

@woozle Um.. have you googled his name yet?

It's... rewarding. Tells you basically everything you need to know.

@woozle Wow, this kid broke bad.

Yay, 3rd ear infection in 2 months.

Hating life right now TBH. >_< Gonna be low-energy and low-whimsy for a while.

(S E A S O N 8 S P O I L E R :

F R Y H A S S E C R E T L Y B E E N Y A N C Y J R . A L L A L O N G)

What, you're not looking forward to the Dark Reimagining that's coming to Netflix in 3022? It's great, it's going to bigger than the new Riverdale, the new Powerpuffs, and the new Teletubbies combined!

Leela's seven feet tall and eats lizards! Fry has a gun! Zoidberg's got a mohawk and his hormones work right! Washbucket is a lead character and she's human! Seymour's fine... and he's a rottweiler! The trailer has a slowed-down sadcore cover of "Walking On Sunshine!"

@KinkyTurtle Note that I am also "Licks An Ion Zebra."

I just got really stoned, cold slid into the premiere of an Omega Mart ad on Youtube, and started spamming improvisational cyphertext for an (as yet) wholly non-existent ARG into the chat.

That was fun. I haven't felt this much like *me* in ages. :D I figure there's a 99.998% chance everybody quite understandably shrugged it off and nobody will look for meaning in the "random" I Ching glyphs I was using to spell out "DRINK THE ORANGE PRODUCT." 😇​

It's cadet-level Operation Mindfuck stuff at best, nothing I delude myself is clever or meaningful. But it was still really fun to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING interesting in what was frankly an infinite-noise zero-signal context before that. (One user was literally just saying "simp" over and over...) It didn't take up much space, nor time, nor distract anyone from anything enjoyable.

And on that 0.002% chance I wake up tomorrow and Reddit's full of "OH MY GOD IS OMEGA MART DOING AN ARG I'M SO EXCITED," hey, I've got my resume prepared... 🐯​

three totally unrelated social media threads this morning have involved fish and dammit it how much of this is a tigress supposed to take

feed me