Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

@Austin_Dern MEBS. UNACCEPTABLE. UNACCEPTABLE. RETURN TO THE ION BOMBARDMENT CITADEL AT ONCE AND DEMAND TO SPEAK TO THIS LORNMIKELZ! *bweeeeeeooooop*

@Austin_Dern DOT'S REIT. I HEAR MANY OF YOU SAYINK YOU'RE NOT MAN ENAFF TO CARRY HUGE VIALS OFF LIQUID PROPELLANT TO LAUNCH COMPLEX SIRTY-NINE. WELL, I'M HERE TO SAY TO ALL YOU LITTLE GIRLY VEHICLES ZAT IT'S TIME TO STOP MEKING EXCUSES!

🎵​​ Artemus, Artemus!
🎵​​ She's totally Artie!
🎵​​ And totally Mus!

@Phorm *clack-clack* *squirk*

*clack-clack* *SQUEAK* *squirk squirk* *CLICK* "Mmmph. *thonkthonk*

*click-tap-click-tap-THONK-FOOOSSSSSHHHHHHT* *th-thonk* *wobble* *squirk* "Mmmpph hmfff." *flicker [memehazard] flicker* *taptap* *wobble* "Mpph-hmmmph." *click* *FSSSSSSHHHHHHOOOOOOPPP*

*thunk*

*stamp* *inkjet noise* *whirr* *prrrrreeeeeeow*

*wiggle* *spank* *tug*

@kistaro Back when I did audio transcription, if we had a client who absolutely demanded our work contain zero "inaudible" markers--- which required us to make a lot of absurd guesses and made the whole thing about 4x more stressful-- I would just start
"guessing" the names of jazz musicians. "We're going to have having a new mingus(?) in the fourth quarter, and we will be sending a new management team to South Corea(?)." O:)

Nobody ever said a damn word.

@JulieSqveakaroo @001zlnv @Phorm

the vending machines
dispense little capsules
with vending machines inside 'em
and those tiny machines
dispense tiny capsules
and so on ad infinitum

@fineursine I'd insist you take me with!

@Phorm You know exactly what you were getting into, Foxtrot-34DD. Report to the airpump at 00[hypnosigil] hundred hours, cadet, and then get yourself into a dispenser capsule and wait until instructed to [five seconds of 56kbit infostatic and vocoded alphanumerics]. Oh, and you overpaid by 30 cents. *coin clatter*

@LeDiva nope
we witch
you fren ​

nuff said

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y3rGPXXk8VE

@monsterblue *curtsies regally¹*

¹disputed

Huh. "Pluto-spiritual." I like that one. I'm gonna try to make that happen.

Basically anything that hybridizes religion with corporate mentality, or offers a consumerist substitute for a spiritual/communal experience.

You know. Crossfit shit. Peloton shit. Scientology. Megachurches. MLMs.

this is the notorious lululemon "manifesto" written by notoriously vapid ceo Chip Wilson

dear gods it's like what's left of a dr bronners soap label after an encounter with a wight

@KinkyTurtle same same <3

THE ANTIS: no adult would ever have any fantasy about a real or fictional child with innocent intentions

ME: literally daydreams about teaching louise belcher how to do logic puzzles because she genuinely loves that kid's intellect like a big sister would

@fineursine He did apparently say he "wouldn't have done it" if he'd known it was offensive, but the full quote... well, just sounds like your classic Hollywood "sorry you chose to be offended, can we not all be reasonable together?" non-apology.

@fineursine Looked it up on wiki. The really interesting thing is even THEN, the producer Richard Shepherd pushed for proper representation! They KNEW that was a net social good and basic damn respect! But yup, Blake Edwards just liked Mickey Rooney's performance too much and insisted.

@fineursine I faintly remember reading that basically EVERYBODY advised Blake Edwards it was not a good idea. Or something similar that indicated NOPE, YUP, it was definitely seen as offensive then too. Nothing can justify it, not even values drift. D: The only consolation is that pretty much everybody involved deeply regretted it.

My day had been emotionally complicated enough without getting Moon River-bombed by a Tiffany's jewelry ad. Of all the damn people who don't have the right to make me cry.

I have no resistance to that song. None. At least it wasn't the Kid Koala version. I would not even be able to type yet by now. You would have had to talk amongst yourselves. Because of the verklempt.

It's a pity the film it's from has fifteen minutes of VIRULENT YELLOWFACE RACISM in it, like the proverbial teaspoon of sewage in a barrel of champagne.

Wow. That went REMARKABLY well, actually. I've had all my lost energy refunded with high interest and actually have a spark of faith in humanity again. Well, in queer-ass furries anyhow. <3