Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

s6: just 11 minutes of Lion going about his usual day, once a week, for 26 straight weeks

lion knocks things off shelves
lion + a bird have a tense standoff
lion finds a really great box
lion won't stop staring at pearl
lion just sleeps for 11 minutes

you know some part of you wants this

rollcall:
square mom*
bird mom
blob mom
aunt dorito
aunt weepy
aunt uzo aduba
stripeyface killah
✨✨✨LION✨✨✨
connie nopenotinthisone
hesher hair human
donut human/yo gotha gotha
jerk human/cap'n pinko
yellow cool human
yellow nightmare human
misc. onion humans
fried humans
pizza humans
other humans
the gemworld equivalent of background ponies**
and joel

*composed of aunt knowitall and aunt yappy
**aka the off-colors

(i kid because i love)

I feel like I should clarify: my dad was actually a pretty good guy if you take his whole personality into account. He was only an asshole on a few specific points... like "dammit, my kid is going to play football" and "dammit, my kid is going to learn to ride a bike." (SPOILER: NEITHER EVER HAPPENED.) But he was still a funny and intelligent guy, despite a bit of a Homer Simpson butthead streak, and I think I had a pretty damn good childhood for the most part.

(None of the above is a subtoot, it's just something I got used to having to fight for on Twitter every year, and I figured it was time to make my yearly defense of Superbowl snark. :> )

This seems like a good time to make my periodic affirmation of values:

I will stop calling it "sportsball" and "handegg" on the very day that a science-fiction program pre-empts a football game, and not an hour sooner. :)

I've got nothing against sports per se, I swear. I've got nothing against sports fans... per se. I have a _huge_ issue with the way the world grinds to a halt for sports culture the way it doesn't for other cultures. I don't really mind the Superbowl; I mind the assumption that I care and I'm the weirdo if I don't.

I even have a low-value trauma card to play: I was stuck working overnight downtown when the Red Sox won the pennant in 2004. It wasn't a terrible experience, nothing exactly happened, but the noise and chaos genuinely scared the shit out of me and I didn't dare set foot outside until morning.

I've also come back from a friend's wedding on the day of a Superbowl and been subjected to some asshole subway bro's long angry rant about how "crazy" someone has to be to get married on Super Bowl Sunday. I guess I've always resented that a little. Nobody who doesn't want to hear about my hobbies gets to make my whole day about theirs, to the point where I have to plan my transit and shopping habits around it.

Oh, and my dad was kind of an asshole. Not abusive or anything, but very stubborn and very determined to get me into something athletic. He chilled towards the end of his short life, and accepted I was going to win him spelling bees, not superbowls, but... yeah, there were some tense times, and sports was a real wedge issue for us.

We're in a predominantly queer community. A lot of us have some serious issues regarding sports as an injection medium for toxic masculinity and unswerving expectations of how we were supposed to behave. You're _going_ to get some residual resentment there. And as long as that culture prevails, you're going to get "handegg," "superb owl," and "sportsball" out of people like me.

It's how we deal. It's not about degrading your hobbies. Your hobbies are fine. The very fact you're our friends means you're probably Not That Kind Of Sports Fan to start with. This is just a little thing we do to show the world "This is something we chose to keep our distance from and that's OKAY." It's like the Little Drummer Boy challenge. It's all in good fun... even if there's a core of real resentment there.

taking a second before bed to reassure my tropical-lizard girlfriend that the local crows will be okay during the cold snap <3

@Leucrotta I was having the same thoughts. They have crumpets at some of the QFCs, but they're just not as good honestly. OTOH, have you discovered the Crumpet Shop down by Pike Place?

There are some really interesting points in this comedians' panel discussion about the infantilization of Christian culture.

I wish this video had been around 14 years ago when I was arguing about religion with conservatives furries on Livejournal. I'd always wanted to give them a good concise "gee, Rez, why aren't you a Christian anymore?" speech, and Pete hits most of the highlights here.

Also, remind me to tell you all the story about the radio show with the camel ride sometime. >_>;;

@acetone_kitten Yeah, I thihk guns were excluded by your dad's character class. People like him are only allowed to wield staves.

And hats.

Nadia Vulvokov is played by Smoky Quartz's voice actress. Huh. Neat.

Okay, Russian Doll on Netflix is seriously life affirming, not at all what I expected, 10/10, watch it if you can handle some adult-grade Singing And Crying without the Singing. Hell, for being so unapologetically queer-friendly (Lizzy is my short-duration personal savior and I want to get high with her), let's make that 11/10. After the year I've had (and the one I've put other people through), this show was SERIOUSLY cathartic.

@LeDiva *lunges out at you* :9~~~

@kobi_lacroix Honestly? This is the closest thing to a coherent political statement I've seen on Terra since Bucky Fuller died. :{ <3

Tigers: 100% Tiger, All The Way Down! That's our Tiger Guarantee!

@LexYeen@snouts.online i choose to believe this, mostly because of the implication that cats therefore sleep 140 out of every 24 hours. =^____^=

I promised @Troodon@occult.camp I would link them to this faked-up wolf documentary. n.n

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xgzl_EP1q9c

I have now cunningly isolated nine distinct strains of Thai letter: the birdies, the horsies, the owls, the sneks, the wiggles, the houses, the hooks, and flags, and the et cetera. 🙃

If you thought any of the above categories provided any clue whatsoever to their letters' phonetic properties, friend, you thought wrong. ​The birdies, alone, are pronounced "j", "k", "n", "ph", and "th".

Except when they're not, like if they're at the end of a word or they're a Sanskrit loan or you forgot to pay your consonant fees.

@Phorm Stripe Fishslammer!