Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

@001zlnv I saw. D: I'm a bit worried for our minipanthers now, too...

@Phorm It's not even worth pulling out the evidence 19 is the year, is it. I mean, I know it's not. I've been there. *hug*

Remind me sometime to tell you the story of how our right-wing nutcase coworker Dolores asked @acetone_kitten what a "666 Matrix" is... and how I got revenge by (accidentally but unrepentantly) convincing her honey was poisonous.

(the above rant was triggered by people on Birdsite asserting that "coronavirus" appearing on last year's disinfectant labels was proof that the epidemic is a big Fake News hoax, without doing the FIVE DAMN MINUTES of research necessary to understand coronavirus is a classification. i'm even braced for some of them to start doubling down at me for my debunking efforts, which started off so polite and just got worse and worse as i wallowed through more "checkmate, liberals!" kind of so-proud-to-be-wrong attitudes. i just can't cheer for these people to remain a part of the human prospect, i'm sorry, maybe someday i'll regain that capacity.)

@hystericempress true american hero <3

this decade is determined to disabuse me of my last shred of conviction that it's never ok to kill people just for being dangerously and arrogantly stupid

i just don't have it in me to root for these people to survive anymore, we have more important things to worry about

i tried, i really tried. i used to be such a postmodernist and worked so hard to find the validity in other people's beliefs and assume that mine weren't objectively true, but there's a certain level of JESUS CHRIST NO, THAT'S *CLEARLY* JUST WRONG that is apparently past my limit

i still wish we could save or fix these people but the time and resources just aren't there and honestly i'm not even sure everybody on "my side" is worth it, best i can offer the world is withdrawing and letting these crazy fuckers work it out for themselves

From the Bojack Horseman subreddit, appropriately enough.

I thought of some of you when I read this. And I thought of some of me when I read this.

As I'm fond of saying in my most morbid humours: "Don't worry---you *will* die! You just have to be a bit patient."

Relevant audio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TRkZpFgJcI

if i woke up tomorrow and found myself to be omnipotent i would make the entire world look like this sculpture, but instead of poetry it would be 400 billion words worth of the embarrassing secrets of the people who run our planet

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A,A

"If there's a George Washingduck on Howard's one dollar bill, are we to believe that every duck has a human analogue on Earth? And if that's true... is there a Howard The Human on Duckworld?" -- some guy on How Did This Get Made

https://www.google.com/search?q=entremets&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS873US881&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwi3vYGxg87oAhWbX80KHWqJDhwQ_AUoAXoECBQQAw&biw=1301&bih=660

@Leucrotta if i end up standing here after midnight making lo mein (it's all i got), it's all your fault, hope you're proud of yourself

@Leucrotta if these ladies are not in heaven the first thing i do when i die will be to steal a bulldozer and MAKE one for them <3

@Leucrotta The only Google hits I'm finding for that are for fish balls and matzo balls, both of which sound like DAMN fine idea. If I ever had the faintest anti-semitic molecule in my body, it was obliterated by the old grannies who ran the Hillel cafeteria at Case Western, who would sell matzoh ball soup for a buck fifty to absolutely anyone who walked in, and would do so with the love and forbearance they had for their own grandchildren ​😻😻😻 i miss them so much

also this episode stars kristen schaal so it's kinda like watching howard the duck with mabel <3

they just raised the excellent point that gilbert gottfried would have been a much better choice for the role of howard

(it's actually ok, friends, i've just been listening to the how did this get made podcast drunk...)

i'm downloading howard the duck

this can't be a good sign

@joshua and of course by that i mean learning to say things like "pootnoodles"

@joshua my parents paid $40,000 for me to learn to talk like that

pootnoodles

@Balina heaven holds a special place for those who accidentally double up on crawfish maki