Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

@PennyPennyPenny It makes me smile every damn time someone on a Very Serious political thread totally fails to comment on the slinky rubber zebra who slid in to argue. :D :D :D

Dunno if I'm the only one here watching this, but... I just want this down for the record so I can bookmark it and come back to it later.

Everybody seems to have settled on it being Jan, Theo, or Teddy. I think they've fallen into the classic trap: they've assumed it's just a single person.

In my experience, "multiple people did it" is a VERY common murder mystery trope and they're ignoring it at their peril.

It's also generally the most satisfying option-- it's complex, it's poised to take maximum advantage of all the clues, and it drastically lowers the chances of fans getting to the solution before the show.

This is going to have been a team effort. I'm betting Tim was killed by a series of events with multiple agents, possibly a Repo Man-grade chain of weird coincidences. Perhaps, for instance, Teddy poisoned some dips and Jan (unwittingly?) conveyed them to Tim?

I just don't buy that someone like Steve Martin would be unaware in 2021 that the fanbase could get way ahead of him. He was one of the very first stand-up comedians to approach his art with an abstract philosophical theory-- *specifically* one about depriving audiences of their natural expectations for as long as possible.

Of COURSE someone during the production of the show, if not necessarily Steve, would have noted that fan communities are *incredibly* aggressive and effective puzzle solvers. So there is just no freaking way we are going to get a single-variable solution to Who Has Done Did The Bad Murder Thing.

Yup, looks like the New Orleans ecosystem missed me so much that it reinfected my ears promptly on return. It's OK, I know the issue this time and already have the drops and a great ENT so I'm not really stressing.

On the other hand, my boss successfully sparred with HR on my behalf and got me the whole week of Ida as well as my travel day last week as "office-closure" vacation hours. In other words, I don't even have to spend any PTO hours on them...

We're still way behind, though. I really NEED a normal fucking week so I can catch up. This is probably going to hinge on whether our network comes back up by Monday. *sigh*

Also, Peebles and Artie remain adorable. If you were hoping for more interesting cat news, I apologize. I'll post some pics when I'm not stuck on mobile Internet.

@eredien right?! perfect aesthetic for me!

oh no

come on doordash i just got back home and i'm fuckin tired

i don't want to have to match wits with a sexy trickster, i just want my fucking dinner

@Phorm You will ALWAYS be categorically welcome on Mars, and woe betide any of my subjects* who stands in our way. Gonna eat their face up rawr rawr. <3

Don't make me show you The Thing again and make you wake up in a warm cozy harem with a big vacant smile, geniefox.

- ear is bothering me again
+ it's stopped itching so it's probably just grumpy from the prodding, not a return of The Ick

- paysheet was $600 short this week
+ boss got right back to me and I *might* be getting the whole Ida week off as vacation as originally understood -- looks like we just miscommunicated

- brain feels like it's 95% catecholamines right now and maybe 400-500 lucky surviving neurons
+ dealer should be available tonite

- way too much random fucking noise at the airport
+ part of that is an adorable little girl meowing very loudly at me <3

- missing the everliving fuck outta Peg
+ plane home boards any minute

was wondering why i hadn't heard back from our dealer since Ida

poor bastard's bedroom ceiling caved in :(

he's still coming by tonight after my flight back to NOLA, what a trooper. i think he's getting a hell of a delivery tip

@Phorm *interacts with some documents on her clipboard for a minute* That one is DEFINITELY getting saved to desktop.

@Phorm Hmmm. That's a keeper.

*saves file to disk; ponders if she can get it printer on a catsuit*

Oh, you can stop playing with yourself in front of everybody and wake up now, Phorm. <3

@anthracite @frameacloud I should really move to dragon.style. Awooing just feels... WRONG for a proud member of Genus Panthera. Even degrading, dare I say.

@Phorm Huh. That's a start, but I don't think it really takes advantage of the rich possibilities inherent in the geniefox autonomic system.

Here, look at this one for a while. If I RTFMed correctly, it should hit a bit... lower.

"This AI would be a really good source of Very Specific hypnotic sigils to train somebody on."

https://twitter.com/Trichet_Nested

@chimerror COMRADE PEEBLES DEMONSTRATES THE DOCTRINALLY CORRECT USE OF THE FEATHERSTICK ❤️​

@chimerror take it from a homicidal psycho jungle beast who's been there and didn't like what she saw in the mirror: get yourself a squeaky thing to murder, or maybe mount a feather on a stick

i know you know me, or at least know the furry thing and why it works, well enough by this point that i don't even have to say "haha haha only serious."

because we cats sometimes get haha only murderous and WE ARE STILL VERY CUTE AND GOOD 😽​

@chimerror
note that when i was living in boston i used a Fearless Leader from Bullwinkle doll that acetone_kitten found in a bodega down the street and i called it my "fascist on a stick." highly satisfying, much recommended, 10/10 murderbait

@chimerror Oh.

Oh honey, no,

You don't need to do that.

Live. Laugh. Love.

Don't watch Matrix Revolutions.

(OK, do watch Matrix Revolutions but do it at home so you can keep a good book or a video game handy for all the scenes that aren't blatant soft-core rubberfetish porn. ;D )

@Leucrotta this makes me feel less self-conscious about just how often i sing the pixie-hunting song from the smurfs

@chimerror same tbh

@monsterblue (YOUR idea is appealing, though. Cats and dragons just... I dunno, we vibe. We share a common understanding of the power of laziness and indifference. I bet you don't come when called either.)