Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

God, Robot Chicken just totally fails to entertain me every single time. I didn't like "hey, look, we took a beloved children's icon and made it EDGY" the first 4,000 times, and... like... shouldn't Seth Green have matured a LITTLE bit past adolescence in the last 16 years?

i keep hearing snippets of conversation from the neighbors across the street and they sound sad about something and i hope they're ok-- christ, their college-aged kid has been my parents' hero-knight while stepdad's been sick-- but from the perspective of my own emotional wellness and current ability to deal with poignance i might as well take a dagger bath

"apply intense thermal energy to permanently alter his existential status"

Some cruel little part of me keeps looking at people who suddenly have chronic fatigue symptoms after long COVID and thinking, "Welp. There ya go. Now you know how it feels, ya no-longer-normie fuck."

Have fun with the empty advice. Have fun getting blamed. Have fun getting told, 'Oh, I know, I get tired at work too, it's normal' when what you're actually doing is spending your lunch napping on the floor of the bathroom, desperately trying to scavenge enough energy to get through just another hour. Oh, and enjoy EVERY MOTHER FUCKER who tells you yoga or herbal tea is the solution.

But I also have a lot of sympathy. And I should start reassuring more of these people, hey, it really DOES get better.

I've read chronic fatigue kinda goes on a 5-year cycle and you basically flip a coin at the end of each one, and if it comes up heads, you recover. Don't quote me on that, it's a half-memory. But it was true in my case and I seem to have won my second flip.

My energy level will never be normal. My focus level will never be normal. But I'm functional and most days I totally forget I ever had chronic fatigue at all. It'll be okay.

Great General Champawat
Great Admiral Richard Parker*
Great Engineer Tippu Sahib
Great Merchant Sasha ​🎄​🎁​
Great Prophet Hobbes
Great Scientist Tony**
Great Writer Baihu
Great Artist Montecore
Great Musician Daniel

*i was so proud of this one 😺​
**hey nutrition is a real science 😾​

Hey.

Um.

I just wanted to do one good deed this year.

So I'm awarding my victory in the 2022 Little Drummer Boy Challenge to @Soreth. I will be listening to David Bowie's version now, as a symbolic gesture of transfer.

Merry Christmas, Ms. Dragon. <3

*throws up hands* Fuck it. Tim and Eric. We're doing Tim and Eric. I am literally so twisted up inside right now that it's the only media I can digest. It's a zero-poignance emergency diet, like one of those scrub-root poverty foods that poisons you just a little but at least you won't die.

Started watching Secret Window because I'm bored and it was there. Saw the dog and thought "Huh, they're giving that dog a lot of attention. Dammit, are they setting up a Sacrificial Pet?"

Checked on DoesTheDogDie.com. Was right. Closed the browser.

I'm not one of those people who's super-sensitive about these things -- at least, not unless I'm actively anxious about the cats for whatever reason.

But FUCK do I hate emotional manipulation, and I can usally tell when a film is about to do lazy shit for a cheap tearjerk. No thanks.

Good riddance, Rotten Tomatoes gives it a 46% anyway. Can someone recommend a GOOD thriller in a similar vein, that DOESN'T sacrifice a pet-- or FFS, an otherwise totally plot-superfluous woman, LOOKING AT YOU HERE DAVID FINCHER YA SHITBIRD-- so they don't have to bother establishing any real tension?

trying to put myself back together by watching numberphile videos

math is comforting to me

at least some things are both beautiful and eternal

Welp, mom finally dropped the Poignance Bomb I was braced for. We talked about what happens if my stepdad doesn't make it through the year, which is not at all impossible.

Rough conversation. We talked about how many of his friends he's lost in the last few years, including my mom's brother, his own brother, his own dad, and his son/my brother Matt, who was an amazing kid and we all miss the shit out of. ;___;

And it hurt a lot, honestly, because... it's like... how do you tell your mom "YES OK BUT I KNEW THIS ALREADY BECAUSE I HAVE CHRONIC ANXIETY AND DEATH TRAUMA LEFT OVER FROM DAD SO UM I KINDA PONDER THESE THINGS 5-6 TIMES ON A NORMAL DAY."

It's funny, mom was back to full good humor 20 seconds after we finished talking, and that just makes me feel worse, because... god, it reminds me she just has to live immersed in this every day. And I feel powerless and horrible, all reminded that EVERY story on this miserable planet ends with a tragedy and I'm gonna lose EVERYONE someday.

I could use... anything. Anything. I'm reeling. I dunno. Anything you can offer.

"i want you to find the son of a bitch who ran this beautiful, soft young man through the douchifier and bring me his head"

"i'm whatever the disappointed equivalent of impressed is"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xs-jXgNHW7Y

miss you pretty dragon lady <3

wow

my mom was so right

one, not giving a shit if people don't like you really is a superpower

two, it kicks in naturally in our family somewhere around our 40s

i feel like that kid from "invincible" (what was his superhero name?🤔​) except i didn't have to inherit my powers from space hitler

just from an run-of-the-mill, absolutely savage, midwestern mama bear with zero chill <3

Some glorious day, the right-wing militias will discover just how heavily armed queer people are.

But until then, I will have to settle for the thrill of seeing the surprise on these cringefarmers' faces when they realize that, yeah, contrary to what they've been taught to expect, furries do have a sense of irony.

And some of us have been carefully sharpening it for YEARS waiting for this kind of thrill.

🐯​​​🍴​🐯🍴​​​​🐯🍴​​​​🐯🍴​​​​🐯🍴​​​​

The thing about being tormented constantly by queer-furry-bashing trolls for >5 years is that you start to recognize just why and how some of their tactics work so damn well.

These people might as well have built me in a lab like a Terminator. They have only themselves to blame. I am the Robo-Bambi T1000, Butcher of Goon Hill (there is an actual story behind this), and no earthly force but death can stop me.

nothin like a few Christmas Island flags to show you're not sincere in the least ^_______^

trust me, this idiot deserved it-- basically a KiwiFarms chudlet who bitched some poor pony fan out PURELY for calling herself a pony and having a pony icon, because apparently This Is Why The Normies Won't Take Queer People Seriously.

His buddy threatened me with Twitter Jail, which is hilarious, for "stalking" his friend, which is also hilarious. I read the whole TOS for kicks: there's no rule against "going through old tweets looking for snarkbait." Sorry, Vladdie. :D

i spend the whole fucking afternoon carefully treating my cultural malaise with megadoses of strong bad email and what the fuck happens

my parents come along and remind me they LOVE the big bang theory and kick it all off all over again

guess i have to move onto stronger stuff-- god, what IS the diametric opposite of big bang theory? young ones, probably?

fuck, i wish it were legal in ohio to get sblounskched. i need to get good and sblounskched.

haha, turns out EVERYBODY got an 11-day weekend at HERE Technologies this year, even though we only technically had TWO holiday days scheduled

just 'cause the ceo felt like it apparently

i fuckin' love europeans <3 <3 <3

One of these days I really need to break down and do some research into famous tigers, so I can put together a Martian festival calendar. :)