Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

At Akron-Canton Airport, with an hour or so to kill before my flight. It's not a problem, I packed enough entertainment to keep me going for days. You kinda have to when you're headed to small-town Ohio.

Mom took me aside again to thank me for everything and reassure me the last week is NOT representative of how my stepdad is most days. He's usually a bit better. That's... still kinda concerning, honestly, but we're hoping better weather and the end of holiday stress will help.

Pretty good in general. None of my Fascist-Frog Hunting on Twitter yesterday has panned out and I'm slightly disappointed about that.

Glad I visited. Had a lot of reminders in the last few days, tough as it's been for everybody, that my family REALLY lucked out by being so full of genuinely good caring people. (In contrast with my stepdad's family, which he and my mom barely talk to anymore. Because they got sick of the infighting and general Dennis and Sweet Dee attitudes. >__< )

Really, really, really looking forward to Peg, kitties, cannabis, and 70 degree weather.

* pinned red pill tweet
* guy fawkes mask in banner
* moe toddler anime icon
* multiple frog emojis in bio
* hundreds of meme retweets
* no trace of any creative hobbies
* personal identification with success of sports team
* argues purely in two-hour Youtube videos
* "THINK FOR YOURSELF" in bio

If you want to visualize Brill, BTW, get one of those teleporter pods from The Fly and merge Figure A with Figures B through D.

That is basically the Weird Science equivalent of the Final Girl Magic that produced Brill...

[GUARDIAN DOG-GIRL SUBPERSONA "BRILL":]

"Your ear has no user-serviceable parts. Repeat it with me."

"I'm serious."

"YOUR EAR HAS NO USER SERVICEABLE PARTS."

"Put the fucking Q-Tip DOWN and think for three seconds about what happened last time. FOR FIVE MONTHS."

"Your. Ear. Has. No. User. Serviceable. Parts. Arf. Arf. Grr."

"I'm gonna tattoo it backward on your forehead while you sleep. Your ear has no user serviceable parts."

it's been a rough holiday but right now i feel, in my petty little way, about twelve tigers tall =^______^=

🤑​🔫​🐯​

The toughes part of mass-reporting fascists and transphobes: picking the one obligatory survivor to taunt with the deaths of their friends.

(Insert Chris Onstad's rant about how the Achewood guest strips where people think it's funny to make Philippe cuss and smoke were always at the bottom of the barrel, not because it's offensive, but because it's such a safe and boring choice...)

God, Robot Chicken just totally fails to entertain me every single time. I didn't like "hey, look, we took a beloved children's icon and made it EDGY" the first 4,000 times, and... like... shouldn't Seth Green have matured a LITTLE bit past adolescence in the last 16 years?

i keep hearing snippets of conversation from the neighbors across the street and they sound sad about something and i hope they're ok-- christ, their college-aged kid has been my parents' hero-knight while stepdad's been sick-- but from the perspective of my own emotional wellness and current ability to deal with poignance i might as well take a dagger bath

"apply intense thermal energy to permanently alter his existential status"

Some cruel little part of me keeps looking at people who suddenly have chronic fatigue symptoms after long COVID and thinking, "Welp. There ya go. Now you know how it feels, ya no-longer-normie fuck."

Have fun with the empty advice. Have fun getting blamed. Have fun getting told, 'Oh, I know, I get tired at work too, it's normal' when what you're actually doing is spending your lunch napping on the floor of the bathroom, desperately trying to scavenge enough energy to get through just another hour. Oh, and enjoy EVERY MOTHER FUCKER who tells you yoga or herbal tea is the solution.

But I also have a lot of sympathy. And I should start reassuring more of these people, hey, it really DOES get better.

I've read chronic fatigue kinda goes on a 5-year cycle and you basically flip a coin at the end of each one, and if it comes up heads, you recover. Don't quote me on that, it's a half-memory. But it was true in my case and I seem to have won my second flip.

My energy level will never be normal. My focus level will never be normal. But I'm functional and most days I totally forget I ever had chronic fatigue at all. It'll be okay.

Great General Champawat
Great Admiral Richard Parker*
Great Engineer Tippu Sahib
Great Merchant Sasha ​🎄​🎁​
Great Prophet Hobbes
Great Scientist Tony**
Great Writer Baihu
Great Artist Montecore
Great Musician Daniel

*i was so proud of this one 😺​
**hey nutrition is a real science 😾​

Hey.

Um.

I just wanted to do one good deed this year.

So I'm awarding my victory in the 2022 Little Drummer Boy Challenge to @Soreth. I will be listening to David Bowie's version now, as a symbolic gesture of transfer.

Merry Christmas, Ms. Dragon. <3

*throws up hands* Fuck it. Tim and Eric. We're doing Tim and Eric. I am literally so twisted up inside right now that it's the only media I can digest. It's a zero-poignance emergency diet, like one of those scrub-root poverty foods that poisons you just a little but at least you won't die.

Started watching Secret Window because I'm bored and it was there. Saw the dog and thought "Huh, they're giving that dog a lot of attention. Dammit, are they setting up a Sacrificial Pet?"

Checked on DoesTheDogDie.com. Was right. Closed the browser.

I'm not one of those people who's super-sensitive about these things -- at least, not unless I'm actively anxious about the cats for whatever reason.

But FUCK do I hate emotional manipulation, and I can usally tell when a film is about to do lazy shit for a cheap tearjerk. No thanks.

Good riddance, Rotten Tomatoes gives it a 46% anyway. Can someone recommend a GOOD thriller in a similar vein, that DOESN'T sacrifice a pet-- or FFS, an otherwise totally plot-superfluous woman, LOOKING AT YOU HERE DAVID FINCHER YA SHITBIRD-- so they don't have to bother establishing any real tension?

trying to put myself back together by watching numberphile videos

math is comforting to me

at least some things are both beautiful and eternal

Welp, mom finally dropped the Poignance Bomb I was braced for. We talked about what happens if my stepdad doesn't make it through the year, which is not at all impossible.

Rough conversation. We talked about how many of his friends he's lost in the last few years, including my mom's brother, his own brother, his own dad, and his son/my brother Matt, who was an amazing kid and we all miss the shit out of. ;___;

And it hurt a lot, honestly, because... it's like... how do you tell your mom "YES OK BUT I KNEW THIS ALREADY BECAUSE I HAVE CHRONIC ANXIETY AND DEATH TRAUMA LEFT OVER FROM DAD SO UM I KINDA PONDER THESE THINGS 5-6 TIMES ON A NORMAL DAY."

It's funny, mom was back to full good humor 20 seconds after we finished talking, and that just makes me feel worse, because... god, it reminds me she just has to live immersed in this every day. And I feel powerless and horrible, all reminded that EVERY story on this miserable planet ends with a tragedy and I'm gonna lose EVERYONE someday.

I could use... anything. Anything. I'm reeling. I dunno. Anything you can offer.

"i want you to find the son of a bitch who ran this beautiful, soft young man through the douchifier and bring me his head"