MH (-, sui mention)
I seriously want to stop right now. Just... not be. I'm hurting too much, I'm crying too much, and I wish I could be just a little less broken, and that day never really comes. >.<
re: MH (-, sui mention)
Little more stable at the moment, going to try to nap. Will respond individually later, but thank you all so much for reaching out. >.<
re: MH (-, sui mention)
So, the cycle I seem to keep hitting is this:
1. Mess up on meds at some point. (I just forget doses sometimes.)
2. My anxiety crashes get extra bad, because unstable meds.
3. Unable to work / deal with life in general.
4. Feel terrible that useless and never good enough and obsessively worry that my boss isn't /really/ telling me what he thinks (that I'm a terrible employee and am going to end up fired).
5. Crash hard enough from #2-4, esp resulting overwork from #4 that I mess up my sleep schedule and end up missing medication doses.
I at least know the problem, but stabilizing and getting out of this loop long term is brutally difficult.
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@CoronaCoreanici They do if you don't end up ignoring them fairly quickly. :/
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@CoronaCoreanici I have re-enabled mine now though. Hopefully working from home will make me more apt to listening to them.
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@zetasyanthis @CoronaCoreanici
I started using a pill-minder app, and made it a rule that I don't take my meds without having my phone handy and the app open so I know I can trust the records the app keeps
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@mawr @zetasyanthis @CoronaCoreanici We use this: https://www.timercap.com/ but that only works for some kinds of medication difficulty
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@Felthry @mawr @CoronaCoreanici Interesting... I'd not seen that before.
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@zetasyanthis @mawr @CoronaCoreanici All it does is count up from when you close the pill bottle, it works well for us because we more frequently think "wait did we already take it or not" rather than just forget completely, and that timer tells us whether we already took it or not
They last a year or so on a single battery and though they claim the batteries are non-replaceable they're actually quite easy to replace
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@Felthry @mawr @CoronaCoreanici I love it when they say that. I own both a soldering iron and a dremel, so it's really a challenge at that point. :P
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@zetasyanthis @mawr @CoronaCoreanici You don't actually need either of those, you can just pull out one little removable plastic thingy and get easy access to the battery. All you need is a spudger or screwdriver to finagle the plastic thingy out of there.
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@Felthry @mawr @CoronaCoreanici Got those too, but they feel less mad-sciencey. :P
@zetasyanthis The batteries are a little uncommon; it takes a single 1.5V button cell, but most button cells are the lithium 3V type. Just use a 392/SR41 battery, preferably silver oxide, and you'll be fine.
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@Veladynee *hugs super tight then* I'm working on getting better at it. You can too. (But it's awful in the meantime. >.<)
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@zetasyanthis It's just tough, and its a long road. But yeah, I'm working on it, too, much as my brain is trying to work in the opposite direction often it seems. @.-.@; But I believe in you to conquer it!
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@zetasyanthis this sounds miserable. I’m sorry it’s being such a mess. *hugs*
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@Leucrotta *hugs tight* Yep, mess in aisle 11. That's me. >.<
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@zetasyanthis Hey. We don't know each other well at all, but you're a friend of at least three of my friends, and I hope life gets easier for you soon. Take care. <3
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@Verdigris If you care enough to message, you count as a friend in my book. And I'm working on it. Therapy tonight helped a lot, as does the fact that you care. Thank you. <3
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@zetasyanthis if you use a smartphone on a regular basis, consider an app for medication tracking and reminders. I use one named “Medisafe” and it works okay, but there are others. It’s done a lot to help keep me taking my medications regularly.
re: MH (-, sui mention)
@zetasyanthis Yup, that sounds similar to me in a lot of respects. *Gives plenty of hugs.* It sucks, it really does. I'm sorry you go through those loops. :(