Veladynee Amaren @Veladynee@awoo.space

I am on a day schedule at work for some training.

I am greeted with the chirping of birds, lots of good mornings and smiles. And the warm glow of the sun shining on my face as I take care of morning tasks.

It's absolutely dreadful.

I'm glad delivery grocery services exist because it allows me to avoid one of my major anxiety triggers.

@zetasyanthis Seems like a bit of garlic mixed with butter would sound amazing with it. ^^

@zetasyanthis DELICIOUS BREAD!

When I meditate, I'm always at the same location. Sometimes when I dream it is there too.

It is a shore with pebbles and darkened sand, with cliffs to the left and right. A steady rain, thunder. The waves are rough and almost as exciting as the storm itself. The rain stings with every powerful gust. It's warm yet the water is chill. It is night, and only the faint glow of one of the moons is visible.

In the distance, to my left along the shore and up a cliff is a ruin of some kind. Old, mostly overtaken by moss and roots, with the land beneath slowly returning, bit by crumbling bit, to the ocean beneath.

It is the place I always end up. Where my guides take me. Sometimes others, occasionally faces I remember from before are in the distance, diving down from that cliff perch into the water, thrilled with the energy of the storm.

I do not recognize it from my memories last life but it is familiar. And that familiarity feels old, almost sad in a way. But all of my memories feel old, very old and long ago.

I figured that was interesting enough to share.

@firnen Hopefully I'll get one of those nice cyborg dragon bodies then. Or just be uploaded to a nanite swarm. Mmm shapeshifting goo.

@kistaro Well I use functioning in a loose sense. >>

More it works as a reset button after I come down for a good while. But yeah, stuff to explore with the brain doc!

@kistaro Yeah... I use CBD-THC 1:1s for a similar reason nightly. Especially also before any party or social event not work related. It's kind of my "be remotely a functioning person for a few hours" button. ^^;

No insomnia from the 1:1s tho directly, but do get intensive dreams that can interrupt sleep.

As for escital... I may ask my doc on something like that ^^ Was on an SSRI before but it nuked my emotions entirely.

I want to go swimming or diving but I'm too crippled by body confidence issues to wear any sort of swim suit. :/

@kistaro Nice to meet you, flying lizard!

My fear of people extends to unknown environments and people. Tis fun. Now I know why I am so anxious when it comes to going out!

Hi everyone, my name is Veladynee and I'm afraid of people. I'm also a fish.