Xurnami, Hyena-dragon @xurnami@awoo.space
Transformative Experience Designer. I make monsters (the fun kind) & code (the functional kind). @ me with TF.
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pronouns: she/her
gender: 🍈🍈🍆
website: http://xurnami.com/contact
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Joined May 2017
Anxiety, media, self-care
I don't know how to disconnect. I try watching media but I run out of that. 45 has made me yet again fearful about existence and how it might get me along with everyone else wiped out by two enormous narcissists.
I just started living.
Xurnami, Hyena-dragon
boosted
the old teenage bicycle
Brought my old bicycle into the shop, after years of neglect (most of them being not having enough money to get it fixed up). It's repairable, but... it's small and I'm bigger and we don't really match each other anymore. Repairable, but the guy at the shop recommended I donate it to a nonproft bike shop and let them fix it up for someone who needs it.
Surprisingly emotional about it, given that I've barely touched the bike in years.
She was a really good bike, though.
@IrisKalmia I too am big on the cybergoth aesthetic.
@IrisKalmia Oh wow, the music video for Pong has been #goals for me for a while.
@Fuego I just started working with a personal trainer. I too know this feel tonight.
@Lioness Roll into a ball. Sushi roll. Transform and roll out.
Kin stuff
It has been a while but I've been chatting and spending more time with Otherkin folks. And now I wake up with phantom tail.
I saw a bunch of got cuties over on the birdsite. I still want to push that direction. Is there a place that will do like a goth makeover?
Anarchist Heresy
@Ratttz Let's chat elsewhere since I can explain all this. :)
Anarchist Heresy
@Ratttz I have been considering building a cryptocurrency which has constant inflation instead of constant deflation like all the others. I think that'd work for this and make it less useful as a value store too.
@tiden If it is bothering you, get a hairband.
@Oneironott Dragons with all genders.
Mental health
TFW you realize that your childhood gave you PTSD. "How to Cope With a Sense of a Foreshortened Future"
https://www.verywell.com/coping-with-a-foreshortened-future-ptsd-2797225 is something I have dealt with for a very long time and never had a word for it.
@IrisKalmia If it is SFW, Twitch does support "IRL" streams.
Psych meds
Learn to read your own medications better yeen. Found out I’m on Buspar not Wellbutrin. My alcohol adventures are even less possibly related.
Anxiety, Alcohol
Oh, that also might be because I forgot my pills yesterday night.
Anxiety, Alcohol
Yesterday, I learned that alcohol, especially socially, can shut off the anxiety part of my brain for a while.
Today, I learned that my anxiety part of my brain is trying to make up for that.
Therapy and Mortality
Please keep responses to this light and more being supportive hugging and stuff as I'm still not super stable about this stuff.
Had my first therapy appointment dealing with my mortality anxiety. After lots of crying, found that it quite probably has a basis in how my parents ruined my childhood. Fun realizations.
Transformative Experience Designer. I make monsters (the fun kind) & code (the functional kind). @ me with TF.
---
pronouns: she/her
gender: 🍈🍈🍆
website: http://xurnami.com/contact
---
Joined May 2017
