Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

Dammit, I used to have a list of songs that worked as Comedy Background Music for any given Youtube video.

Obviously, "Yakkity Sax" was one. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNBL5OMeuno) As well as my personal weapon of choice, "Bond Street" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3Vm2KoPsQE). But I had DOZENS of these.

And then we get into the classics, like "Entry of the Gladiators" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HqIY3NfoYvw) and the "Saber Dance" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gqg3l3r_DRI).

And Raymond Scott is a category of his own. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IniM_SafwYw) (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JNM0pgh4CiI)

And "French" should be its own category. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Shs2H9u6wak)

Anyone care to help me reconstruct the rest of this? Goofy hijinx music. Pony up.

Today's playlist: right back to the late 90s post-grunge poo-rock. You can hear the collars popping over a five-block radius, like so much forced rhubarb. And everything smells like Massengill for some reason.

Original artwork for above card:

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/47971/ [WARNING: NSFW; GINORMOUS NUDE TIGER MAMMARIES]

🐯​❤️​

@Phorm I admit I would play the hell out of a Star mod...

...but only if you could be Hekapoo. 😻​

@JulieSqveakaroo Ooh, thanks roo, looks right up my alley!

If you mark your Game Of Thrones, Middle Earth, Fallout, or yes, even your goddamn My Little Pony Civ mod in the Steam Workshop as "Historical," there is a special place for you in strat gamer hell.

It's a 19-hex desert with no oases, rivers, or resources, with Attila, Shaka, and Montezuma as your neighbors. And you will be playing for eternity as my own special homebrew civ: Lilliput.

Good luck, you elf-lovin' piece of shit.

lvl374

submitted without commentary

https://lvl374.tumblr.com/ [mostly SFW, some violence/bloodshed]

Ironically, Pablo Picasso and Gertrude Stein were both HUGE assholes. But it's still a pretty good playlist if I do say so myself.

Have some more Old Person Music.

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLWiaTQ91EE2FcEVBPweWRuNxtY3R13fol

@001zlnv Itchy and Scratchyland, or are we talking about, like Season 276 "gone totally off the rails" Simpsons?

Jehovah is Lucifer's unindicted co-conspirator.

CURRENT TIGER + GIN COUNT:
BLEVENTEEN

CURRENT TIGER CURRY SPICE LEVEL COUNT:
BLEVENTEEN

ENDORPHINS EQUALS VERY YES

ADJUST YOUR ORBITAL DEFENSES ACCORDINGLY WE GET A BIT BITEY

THIS BULLETIN IS IN COMPLIANCE WITH THE 2369 DEIMOS OW OW OW MY HEAD TREATY

@Leucrotta Take comfort that no matter how bad things look, you don't taste like menthol and camphor. *hug*

Oh god. Peg found the deliberately awful Candy Orca Dragon we made, based on the Disgusting English Candy Drill from Gravity's Rainbow (http://bella.media.mit.edu/people/foner/Fun/gravity.html)

I'm sorry, Rowntree. In a kinder world, you would never have had to exist. Blame the Brits.

I'm so glad to finally have an answer to my question, "Is Incredibles 2 as full of kneejerk libertarian fuckwittery as the first one?"

It's a good film otherwise and the ideology's nothing I can't just put a little fence around (thanks for the idea, Catbug!) but... god, I find the protagonists so grating.

If not for the fondness for collateral damage against civilians, I'd be so close to cheering for Screenslaver, especially since I already know all the spoilers. -_-

@Austin_Dern It is, but the mechanics don't really *do* much with it. There was no in-game reward for donating a city (which you can do in the diplomacy screen), just a sense of smug satisfaction. ^_^

@hummingrain I used to be an avowed self-defense-only pacifist in Civ.

I find I like this much better. *cracks knuckles*

I just brought my most morally satisfying ever game of Civ V to a close.

It's been going for three days. Saturday, I was best buds with Alexander. We laughed, we traded, we drank retsina, we backstabbed the French together... You know, imperial bro stuff.

All I wanted was Troyes. Napoleon had settled it WAY into our historic territory and I was a little sore about it a thousand years later. When Al came to me, I really though we were just gonna rough Napo up a little, peel off a couple of his cities, and bring him down a peg.

Nope. It quickly became clear that my old friend was going to fight a war of unbridled conquest. I pondered letting him do it and just taking him out later, for old time's sake. War is war. But then I turned around and Paris was on fire. He was razing it to the ground and exterminating its citizens.

That was a bridge too far. I made a pact with Napoleon and Al's previous victim Ashurbanipal (who, like Napo, had been a right good sport about the whole thing) and immediately declared war.

By 1880... no more Greek bullies. We kept his cities, remanded all of Ashi and Napo's territory back to them, and even rebuilt Paris and handed it over to its rightful owner—better than ever, with 3000 gold worth of shiny new Babylonian technology.

Then we dismantled our entire army except for basic garrisons, swore a defensive pact with the French and Assyrians, rebuilt our trade lanes with a less genocidal partner, and looked towards the stars.

Felt good, man. Especially after this last fuckin' week.

Today I learned that a pimp plus a dick is a bumfit, and a dick plus a dick is a figgot. (At least in Lincolnshire.)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yan_Tan_Tethera

I'm gonna have the macaroni and cheese tonight. Like, all of it. Yours too. There will be no more macaroni, or cheese. Not unless there turns out to be more macaroni than cheese or vice versa. 🐯​