Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

@Aradia I can't get to the link, am too stuck on the wonderfulness of "Tenacious Unicorn Ranch." :D :D: :D <3 <3 <3,

HINT 2: The line was spoken by a teenager.

HINT 3: The show it was spoken on is known for an EXCEPTIONALLY funky theme song.

HINT 4: Your parents' tax dollars funded it.

HINT 5: Easy Reader. That's my name. I said uh. Uh. Uh.

$1,000 worth of no-prize to anyone who can identify the following quote:

"Archdukes, archduchesses... there were a lot of arch people!"

I know there's gotta be at least ONE other Gen-Xer whose brain that got stuck in.

(HINT: PBS.)

@mawr Listen, mawr, say what you want but IMHO you haven't really lived until you've fucked a chuckle.

"For reasons unknown, someone has shaped this lump of epoxy into human-like form, perhaps in an attempt to comprehend their own hideous shape-- more likely to mock the God that blighted them so..."

"I shall now observe the ungainly peach-colored creature. His humid, fleshy extensions struggle as he attempts to dominate some simple, seemingly purposeless toy. Already a sense of pity overcomes me yet I am repelled by my own compassion."

"Although his biological makeup implies a living thing, I am certain we shall discover him to be but an animated piece of refuse or feces, but I must remain impartial and continue to study even as he mocks everything I hold dear. I hate him. I can take comfort only in my cool detachment."

"He looks at me now, and no flicker of comprehension do I discern in his flat and lifeless eyes. I can only pray that his tiny spinal column conveys no spark of truth, no splinter of the horrible reality that this is all inside. My God! I pray for his death, as do all things that love rightness and decency."

The above pretty much sums up how I feel about my day on Twitter.

@Leucrotta Sorry, bud, you KNOW damn well where and how I developed an immunity to coyote germs. :D

(But I mean, HOW many edible lifeforms are there on this planet? I'll probably never even get around to any of you, to be honest.)

@Leucrotta I think that's 100% part of it, yeah. Seemed to be the MO of the anti-furry trolls, who stil astound me how much the resembled today's TERFs and MAGAs in their willingness to weaponize bad faith.

@001zlnv Exactly, 80% of what I do as a furry has been more or less "having a goddamn intellectual life with my friends."

Heh, maybe that's what offends them. People who talk about non-superficial things ask a LOT of uncomfortable questions about dogma.

I already know the answer to this, but... how the hell did we end up with an entire generation of Republicans that thinks "I'm rubber, you're glue" is a valid debate tactic and you can disprove a valid accusation just by telling the accuser they did it too, no matter what it is or how much you have to stretch the definition?

I really don't think the answer is
"not enough education," though. I think the answer is "because it consistently works, and who gives a fuck if it gets you any closer to the truth or not!?"

Several of them actually made fun of me for being a furry, too. That's just so... quaint.

But mostly it makes me so much more grateful that I have furry in my life, and all the social technologies it allows, and this place, and all of you-- and that my enemies have to make do with a social "bond" to their allies based purely on a common spite.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE the contrast between the stuff they assume we do behind closed dors, and what actually happens when I'm with you people. Stuff that they seem like absolute shit at, like humor and empathy.

Thanks for not being them. I am gonna eat you people after EVERYBODY else on Earth, and only when I'm absolutely out of other snacks, I swear! 🐯❤️​

God, I'm just feelin' low and mean and... well, tigery today.

Wasted all morning tearing into TERFs; don't regret a bit of it. Kinda wish I had time for more.

All I wanna do is hurt bad people and break their stuff today. And maybe piss on some things of theirs so they become mine.

Just hang a TERF from the ceiling like a pinata and let me show you just what tigers are capable of when their predatory instincts don't get enough exercise.

You might want to lay down a tarp.

Stepdad is headed home with a heart monitor, new meds, and a new cardiologist. He's feeling fine and happy to be discharged!

I just dug up a rich lawyer's cell phone number and called him a "garbage human" for essentially calling food and drug regulations, the ADA, and traffic laws "fascism" in the midst of a The Progressives Are The Real Fascists You See rant.

He also claimed the conservatives have never been responsible for abridging anybody's freedom. Which is some fucking nerve after Texas's abortion bounty bill.

I regret less than nothing. At this point in my nation's decline, I wish I'd had a more direct means of communiction. Like a meathook. Or a two-by-four with a nail through it.

So hyped for the destruction of humanity.

@Austin_Dern
"Nothing that grieves us can be called little: by the eternal laws of proportion a child's loss of a doll and a king's loss of a crown are events of the same size." -- Mark Twain, Which Was the Dream?

We're all in this together, Sam Lowry.

*hugs*

I've got keys to the wheels
I've put some money aside
Disappear from this world
No one would mind
Fly through the air
Leaving no trail
'Cause when you're in space
They can't hear you fail

Let's escape from it all
Become someone new
I'm annoying I know
But what can you do?
I just love to drive
So put me in jail
'Cause when you''re in space
They can't hear you fail

OK, I do feel a little better now.

Not just because this orby little shit is cute as hell, but because apparently Nicki Minaj's recording company's going out of its way to DMCA him, which means I get to feel like a tiny bit of an outlaw.

Streisand Effect the hell out of this ferret for me, willya?

https://random-ferret.tumblr.com/post/650832523803459584/mileskitaro-mileskitaro-nicki-minaj-ferret

#forbiddenferret

Good stuff:

* Oh god Only Murders in the Building is so good. If I were really at the edge (which I'm not), this is one of those shows that would keep me alive from sheer anticipation.

* Kink life has some promising opportunities, I just need to find time and energy and score up some libido.

* Really liking the new laptop. Tiny but FAST and clever, especially now that it's been cured of its bloatware. I might name it Poiuyt after my dear little mischievous jackalope plushie.

* Cats seem pretty happy. Indignant because they didn't get any Feather Time this morning, but happy. Peebles got Epic Scritch and became very very long for a few minutes while I petted her definitely untrapped belly. ^________^

* We're in pretty good financial shape all in all.

@Austin_Dern You too, hun. I admit I've been pretty lucky in terms of the basics, especially compared to a lot of folks down here.

I'm just tired of being on the edge of a crying jag. It's like, DO IT OR DON'T, BRAIN.

Stepdad had another episode but that's kind of a good thing. Turns out he probably has a mild arterial afibrillation that his previous cardios missed. They caught it on the monitor and are keeping him an extra day-- poor guy, he's so sick of this. They suspect they can fix it with some medication changes.

Me? I'm burnt out, nothing else to it. Been suctioning emotional and household resources from Peggy to deal with it, but I feel like I keep crawling into a bigger and bigger serotonin debt.

What I need is a real fucking vacation (as opposed to "seven days off generously granted because you're worried your wife and cats might drown"). None is forthcoming.

I could also really use a mental vacation, but I plowed through the last of our weed-- for which I also feel pretty guilty. Last night, just the idea of poking my head up from the mundanity for just a moment felt so tempting.

I dunno. I miss feeling like an alien humming along on some weird psychic plane, instead of... some fat depressed hairy guy who does geo research for a living.

Dear god, Only Murders in the Building is good.