Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

@Orb2069 This is *really* making me miss living in Davis Square, with 3-4 really good Indian groceries in walking distance... I have trouble finding snacks that hurt me enough. :>

@anthracite Yeah but I think I got a follow-up case of full-blown bronchitis, and you have MUCH better lungs than I do so you'll almost certainly beat that...

@anthracite You got yourself a deal! 😺

holy fuck

behold the rotation viii

it's like the kobold to a standard cabinet's dragon

i am gonna marry this machine someday 🙀

@anthracite I think an act of ACTUAL SACRILEGE AND DEFACING THE IMAGE OF A GODDESS is worth a little hassling.😼

I regret nothing! Did it all for you, Urmah, just like I promised. Thank you for your patience and continued professional attention towards our privy.😽

@Momentrabbit @trouffee Yeah, how the heck are we gonna afford that kind of thing on a corporate drone's salary? :D

Well, that was interesting. Nice to have it confirmed that the social embarrassment circuit and the self-annihiliation circuit are still wired together. (Trivial incident, nobody's fault but mine, just... hit some sensitive old buttons.)

Also nice to know that net length of self-destruction desire has gotten down to roughly 10-15 seconds, because I'm 48 years old, I KNOW you people know I'm a hot mess by now, and what's the worst that one more minor fuck-up's gonna do to me? :D

God. Getting older is AWESOME. This would have been a three-day festival of self-loathing, with special guests and disdainful rock music about me, just 10 years ago.

basically imagine this little champion only metallic pink, deceptively plump, seemingly faceless until the MAAAAAW opens up, chaotic neutral, and just generally real real crummy :D

@arthurwyatt So if Charles Burns's Sugar Skull were the standard metric unit for YIKES I AM NEVER OPENING ANY BODILY ORIFICE UNFILTERED NOR WALKING OUTSIDE WITHOUT A FLAMETHROWER AGAIN, how many of those would we be talking here with Simon's work? :>

if enough points remain, miracle will also have the approximate constitution of special agent jack bauer the gas-drinking cat from it's always sunny in philadelphia

basically if you were to ask your mom for oy the billybumbler from the dark tower series, miracle the sorta-libbit would be "the crappy store-brand billybumbler your mom insists we have at home" 😼

she's just awful, worst baby <3 <3 <3

@Leucrotta Me too until only recently! I'd just always assumed Chtorr was your basic Evil And Safely Shootable Bug Monster Empire for space marines to pick on. It's more like an entire invading ecosystem, DEEPLY nightmarish but right up my alley. 😱

Consequent to all this, a friend found me a PDF of the War Against The Chtorr GURPS supplement and I'm midway through my first character: a mutated libbit (basically a fuzzy pink alien pig normally bred for docility).

Her name is "Miracle" or "Miri" and her mom-thing caught a dose of Terran phytochemicals somewhere in the Amazon Basin that somehow resulted in her daughter-thing being:

* just short of protosapient, INT 7 in GURPS terms
* pointier, biteyer, and scratchier than any libbit was ever meant to be
* possessed of the approximate disposition of a selectively affectionate possum-badger-cat-pig-raccoon, only filthier and smellier
* fond of humans and earth mammals (especially cats) yet absolutely vicious towards all Chtorr lifeforms
* faintly aware of the notions of "yours," "mine now," "not nailed down," "deception," "the power of friendship," and "oops i'm sorry was that YOUR finger, i should look cute now"

In short, Miri is the Best Worst Trash Animal Ever and Terra's last best mangiest hope for a peaceful (if slightly foamy, we should keep an eye on that) future. She will risk her life to save yours and then bite your finger off five minutes later.

I'll never get to play her in anything, but she is my
scruggly little alien mindbaby and I love her. 'Cause really, Miri is just my stinky cat buddy Sugarfoot as a mutant libbit. <3

Huh. Evidently today is Weird Badtouchy Invasive Alien Ecosystem Month for me. I just realized my recent media diet's included:

* Slither
* Shivers
* both Body Snatchers films
* an audiobook of Gerrold's War Against The Chtorr
* Annihilation
* Scavenger's Reign
* I Was A Teenage Exocolonist

Maybe it's time for me to make a quasi-malevolent "Entire Hostile Biosystem" sona. It sure suits my feelings about humanity lately, to wit, "Nothing a good non-consensual mass TF wouldn't fix."

Guess Kincaid (aka my rotten old lavavixen kink-villain) is still bloopin' around in the back of my head somewhere. 🤷

@chimerror QUIT YOUR JOB FOR "BOB"!

@Orb2069 @anthracite I'd really really appreciate it if you rephrased that, hun, for reasons that I think Gracious Anthracite would be all too happy to explain.

I'm... I'm gonna go take four or five consecutive cold showers in the meantime. And then wrap my head in tinfoil and hide. ​

( Valis happens to also, not entirely coincidentally, be the name of my hypno-perv zebra boi sona.😁 )

@typhlosion Ooh, you caught a feline TF? Congratulations! 😼

@Leucrotta Yeah, Google decided that was no longer fiscally supportable. 🤷

(In other words, I know how ya feel. *hug* I've been ruminating a lot lately on how much less all this does for me anymore.)

@Phorm If it had been a Ken Keeler episode I think that would have been my lead theory.

Nobody can crack a dirty math joke like Ken (glaven)!🤓

Well, that's odd. This is a screenshot from Marge Be Not Proud. Look at how on the left-hand side the digits are clearly hand-drawn but on the right they look like they're printed or maybe some Letraset sort of thing. And stocking #4 has six digits, in both scripts, while the others only have five! I wonder what could have possibly happened in production?!