Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

@Balina Sorry, outside of standard Martian business hours, you're on your own. 🐯​

HUGGBEES!

Go ahead. Try it. HUGGBEES!

#TigersStillDontGraspWhatSubtootsAre
#Freakazoid
#ALittleNostalgiaForYouOldFolks

Today I exercised twice, only ate ~1½ meals total, passed up several opportunities for messy dessert, and am about to finish my workweek a day early.

What the hell kind of freak am I becoming?

This is the original intro to the MLP Movie. It got canned.

Step 1: Find a Hasbro executive.
Step 2: Kill them.
Step 3: Find another.
Step 4: Beat them with the one from Step 1.
Step 5: Repeat until they stop ruining everything they touch.

What a complete fucking waste of someone's talent and effort, by some fucknugget who's probably never pushed a pixel in their life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9oMY5YRdhAQ

@hummingrain I mean, the property ownership and "I'm a rentier for a living" thing is pretty immoral on a grand societal scale, I think. But we're ALL complicit in some part of the Grand Machine, so... yeah, a good, fair, friendly landlord is worth their weight in rent. At worst, in my book they are Last Against The Wall When The Revolution Comes. :)

@acetone_kitten I mean, fwliw, *we're* cool. I just kinda consider you Off Fighting The War and maybe we'll reunite someday. Just see me before I move away, yeah?

Oh, Indonesia. Gods bless you and your blithe indifference to Western intellectual property. ❤️​

@zx3 *facepalm* Darling, it's not that they're hamsters. You forgot to take one of the most fundamental principles of villainy into account...

https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ConservationOfNinjutsu

Next time, send ONE hamster. Good luck!

@troodon Oh, and are any of those friends/sources British or European? The Theresa May government is ON FIRE. Or at least, it's soaked in gasoline and May's lighting a cigarette like a dumbass.

@troodon I have no idea what the hell those people are on about. :) The Mueller probe is heating up again and Trump is having another tantrum over it, i.e., it's an ordinary Thursday in Pravda America. ;) Also looks like the Florida recount is about to get bitter and nasty and litigatey, but I think it's one of those where they're trying to keep us from gaining *more*.

Your odds of still being alive in twelve hours are comparatively high.

Hmmm. Sorry. I'm not good at these.

@Aradia @Phorm In love with the man by 60 seconds in. My kinda guy.

@Phorm Haha, @Aradia just got done linking me to that one! OK, now I'm definitely gonna have to watch it, it does sound like it's exactly the right treatment for my existential ailment...

@Phorm Oh gods, that's the other thing, the colossal sense of consumer entitlement. I am REALLY bracing -- should we ever be so lucky to have Parallax actually go anywhere -- for that kind of so-called "fan." Contact with the Steven Universe and MLP fandoms have pretty much soured me on the idea of having a following, and... tbh, I'm trying to fill Parallax full of red-herring bait for the compulsive theorists, whom I also can't stand. :>

@Aradia These all sound SUPER promising, thanks! <3 (Also, I've been real happy with that Nickelodeon historian I've been linking to recently, even if that YCDTOTV one was rough going...)

@Phorm I hate them so much. They're so superficial, so literal-minded, and so willfully ignorant of the ways good cinema SHOULDN'T AND MUSTN'T just blandly recapitulate material reality. I want to just.... pick up my old film prof and bludgeon the shallow fuckers with him. (Shit, he would probably *consent*. :) )

This is why I love Tim Heidecker and Gregg Turkington's On Cinema, especially the early episodes before they got into all the soap opera stuff. They set out to make a film podcast that was as vacuous and obvious as the "real" ones, and... well, that's an unachievably high standard, but they *almost* hit it.

I know there are good Youtube commentators who can do more than sputter "LOL! WTF! I DON'T EVEN!" but damned if my old ass knows how to find 'em. Any recommendations?

You know that one episode of MST3K where Joel flips out and dares Frank and Dr. Forrester to riff a movie, and it's TERRIBLE? Everything they say is just kind of vague "Haha! They sure are in a... wacky situation. You could sure say something there!"

Every single review or reaction video I've ever seen on Youtube has sounded like that to me. No insight, no thesis, no analysis, just some 19-year-old kid giving us full real-time access to his hindbrain.

@emanate @Austin_Dern It's not just you. I skip 90% of the video content that comes up. When I do watch something, I usually default to skipping about 1/3 of a way through -- that usually gets me through *most* of the BS introductory padding.

Honestly, I blame Youtube completely for this. So much of the failure of videos to GET TO THE FUCKING POINT is just users trying to keep up with the goddamn revenue algorithms. It infuriates me. I want OUR fucking Internet back. -___-

On the other hand, I do get to spend the entire morning arguing with people about the precise administrative status of Berlin.

I'm not even being ironic. Arguing about Berlin, specifically, is one of my favorite job activities. My coworkers have nearly come to (very polite rhetorical) blows over this topic several times. It's like a really, really cordial and pedantic bar brawl.

*grins wide; grabs a poolcue engraved "THEY'RE JUST STATISTICAL ENTITIES DAMMIT"; joins the fray* 😺​