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@sydneyfalk For the conclusion to the trilogy, wait for "literally inflammable."

Personal Trauma 

I'm slowly coming to terms with just how badly the last five years have hurt me. I think I'm finally at a point at which the damage is no longer actively accruing, but my mental wounds are still being hit on a regular basis. I want to make it clear, if and when I start to process this shit in any kind of open fashion, that I assign no blame and expect no dogpiling. Everyone involved was doing their best, but some people simply are not compatible, and lots of people got hurt.

... debating whether my trauma is bad enough that I'm going to have to block a server to cope with it. Feeling kind of shitty about even asking if that step is acceptable. Feeling kind of shitty about having to ask whether taking care of myself requires negotiation.

@starkatt Mildly sexy aunt, the one you always suspected drank liquid LSD in the Before Times and never quite found all of herself on the trip back.

gender noodling 

@Soreth If you can document on-call responsibilities and navigate Windows and Linux, we may still be hiring escalation engineers.

@aldersprig I've left a note; we'll see what do. Thank you for the heads=up!

A ritual for a happy home 

Gather your loved ones together.
Tell them all that you love them together.
Tell them individually that you love them, each and every one.
Think of one thing about each of them that you love, and share that love with them.
Share with them how it makes you feel, when you experience that act, that facet of your loved one, that part of their inner self that love.
Be in the moment with them. Hold them each in your heart.

Repeat as desired. It should come more easily the more often it's done. Don't wait for another to start. Open your heart and take that risk, and bathe in the glow of your love returned.

Shit what Electric Keet Says 

"Twilight Sparkle is... one of those __theory__ profs, isn't she?"

The Ongoing Saga 

I'm not expecting it to make any difference, but let's see if filing a complaint with the Office of the Insurance Commissioner has any effect on things.

@packetcharmer@witches.town @mawr Canelle is very happy in the kitchen in the top fruit basket watching my oven timers and temp settings to make sure I don't overbake anything. Thank you.

pol, self-awareness 

@Fuego I do a lot. I fear some days it won't be enough, but I know how much I do. I'm grateful that others respond when they see it. Thank you. You're no slouch yourself, sis. You've done an amazing amount yourself.

pol, self-awareness 

Despite that, I know that I'm at least trying to leave the world in a better state than I found it, for the sake of all those who will outlive me. If there is a soul that transcends death, a part of the self that outlives the mind, it's found in the stories that others share of us when we're no longer around to tell the tales of us. It's in the lives of all those we touch in the time we have and the memories we leave in others. We live as long as people remember us.

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pol, self-awareness 

Let me also be clear here: I know I often fail to live up to my own standards, and I know I can never know just how bad at it I am. I try to turn the scathing touch of the caput mortuum on myself first. I know I'm not doing everything I could be doing to make the world better. I know that I'm consciously opting in many places to favor my comfort over others' survival. I recognize the limits of my own empathy. I often fail at not expecting of others what I don't do myself.

pol 

@green And yes, I understand when people can't fight. I understand disempowerment and helplessness. I understand the limits of individual capacity to fight against a corrupt system or their own demons. I refuse to blame victims for not fighting back. I'm not faulting mice for failing to drag the elephant to the table.

I do blame the people who could speak up and refuse to do so. I blame those who could take a stand and don't. I blame those who have the capacity to fight and don't do so.

pol 

@green "If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor. If an elephant has its foot on the tail of a mouse and you say that you are neutral, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality." Desmond Tutu.

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