Empress of Mars: Undisputed @zebratron2084@awoo.space

Oh god, Castle Rock is a JJ Abrams production? And it describes itself as a "mystery box" show?!

Okay, whew. I had been vaguely interested in this one, and this saves me the trouble of watching it. No more of this shit, not after Westworld and Legion.

You tell me a story, motherfucker. And you have ONE SEASON to answer any questions that you raise, before you are allowed to raise any new ones. I am DONE with puzzleboxes that turn out to be empty. (Read that however you like. ;p )

I'll visit. But after that fucking Stranger article about local landlords (and apparently, most of the commenters on /r/SeattleWA) thinking poor people don't "deserve" to live here, I'm increasingly content to shake the dust off my sandals and let Amazon swallow this city whole. I wish the best of luck to those of you sticking around to fight the good fight, and maybe I'll be back someday, in stronger (and hopefully richer) shape, and actually be able to do you some fucking good again.

"I'm still big. It's the social media that's gotten small."

I'm feeling a lot better, actually, after Peggy spent the morning looking at Padmapper. NOLA is a LOT cheaper than I had been led to believe, and if we can figure out a few little orthocosmic things like insurance, we could actually put together a pretty good life there.

I'm gonna miss the locals a lot, but there's still a big reservoir of pain left for me in this city, and if it ain't gonna get drained... might as well move on.

When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Bastet comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom
"Chill the lion"

https://codepen.io/Yakudoo/pen/YXxmYR

*250 sad plaintive meows*

"Are you hungry, kitty?"

*rawr* 🐯

"Too sleepy?"

*grumble* 🐯

"Um... did you lose your favorite chewin' ball?"

*huff* 🐯

"Okay, is it too warm in your enclosure? Too cold?"

*rawr* 🐯

"Huh. Are you feeling unwanted by your friends and rejected by your society, and worried you'll spend the rest of your life in a bleak, lonely cycle of subsistence and poor health, as the wealthy muscle you out of society altogether?"

*nodnod* 🐯​

Wow. This self-delusion shit is POWERFUL. To my horror, just thinking that these people are somehow just a hoax genuinely and immediately made me feel better.

This comfort is worrisomely similar to the comfort I felt when I was 12, had recently lost my father, and converted to Christianity. -_- I don't think I will be indulging this theory any further.

But damn, it's tempting. It's so tempting to roll my own delusion and lose myself in it. If you can't beat 'em...

Hahaha, wait! I don't have to sit here depressed, just because it feels like I'm a failure and my city is getting overrun with ruthless objectivists! It's 2018! Reality is whatever I want it to be, and it's CERTAINLY malleable to my own comfort!

So, no, the city isn't really being overrun with rich jerks. There is a *conspiracy* to pack local comment boards with libertarian astroturf. It's fake. Anything that makes me unhappy is either a hoax or a conspiracy.

Solved.

It's like, motherfucker, making a bunch of money off of the houses you own is not a goddamned moral achievement. Stop acting like BEING ON YOUR FUCKING PLANET is some kind of unearned entitlement we're pretending to. And stop acting like there isn't something REAL FUCKING ABNORMAL about the way modern capitalism distributes wealth. All I know is that my mom busted her ass 40 years teaching people's kids and is broke, and Donald Trump is extremely rich. Fuck Terra.

(It's all complicated a bit by the fact I still have some Evil Centrist political sympathies, and I actually sympathize with a few things the rentier class is pissed about. Like, the proposal to force them to ignore criminal records when choosing tenants sounds like a potential nightmare to me. But the subsequent hate-fest against the poor, largely by people admitting they made all their money from property, still fills me with plenty of loathing & self-loathing.)

Anyhow, it'll make moving away that much easier, if this town is really filling up with engineers and finance types that only want to live side-by-side with other engineers and finance types.

I'd like to get just one last temp job at Amazon before I leave Seattle for good. 'Cause I want to steal from them hand over fist right now. No excuses, no apologies, it's just pure adolescent fury and outrage at work. And frankly, I'd rather just punch Bezos directly. >___<

I tried debating on the associated Reddit thread a little, but I'm so disheartened by the amount of support the Galt's Gulch crowd is getting. I told them something along the lines of "well, have fun cleaning your own toilets & brewing your own espresso, motherfuckers" and closed the browser in a nasty mood. Haven't been quite right since.

I could really use any sense whatsoever of a safety net or permission to fail a little right now. But I know it ain't coming.

Made the mistake of reading a Stranger article about landlords who are pissing and moaning about the city's attempt to restore some shred of sanity to local housing.

It had the headline "If You Don’t Make the Money, Why Do You Have the Right to Live in the City?" and that triggered my self-hate and DOOOM SENSE something fierce.

And then I made the mistake of reading the comments, and was reminded this city's chock full of libertarians again thanks to Amazon.

Correction. I wish the NEIGHBORS had a dog. The last goddamn thing I need right now is a new relationship commitment. :p

Of course, that would require that we knew any of our neighbors. Not sure I'm THAT lonely yet. (Although, huh, I notice the local wifi server named "kek" has finally disappeared. Dare I hope he moved out? Possibly to Magnitogorsk, to better serve the Maga King?)

The insecurities are trying to eating me again today, and I really wish I had the luxury of just letting them.

Or of eating a hundred cookies. But I don't think I have that luxury either.

I'm not quite in the suicidal ideation phase of the cycle. But I am definitely getting that same feeling I get when a dull film's last act goes on far too long.

I feel super-clingy today. Peg's been patient with it, but dragons have kind of a cling-free coating on them. I wish we had a dog.

Rule 1: If you mention the ethnicity of a service worker in your review, you're probably being a dick.

Rule 2: Seriously. Don't mention the ethnicity of a service worker in your review. It doesn't matter. There is no reason to mention it.

Rule 3: No, not that either. That did not make it okay. Did you even fucking read the other rules?!

Been a little melancholy all day. Reading a Reddit thread about doctors who had lost patients probably didn't help. Now I'm all hung up on past & future again.

We were all supposed to get old together and look out for each other, and now it feels like it's just me and Peg left fending for each other.

It also doesn't help that I finally tracked down copies of Brett Gelman's crazy "Dinner With" specials, but am no longer on speaking terms with the main person I wanted to show them too. :|

run around in circles with your hands and arms flailing around like kermit and go waaaaaaaaaaaaugh until you feel like you have some control over your life

s'what us gen xers are doing

let us know if you figure out how to make it do something

"My honest advice for you, [Jim Groat], is to enscribe Matthew 7:3 on a 3 x 5 index card in your finest calligraphy, roll it up tight, and cram it straight up your nose." -- me, on FA

It's been an entertaining day in many ways, and now it truly feels complete. :D