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*puts head on desk, feedbag full of Oreo crumbs still strapped to his face, and sighs*

Speaking of which, I'm walking into an interpersonal situation that scares the living fuck out of me. So it's probably a good time to reaffirm publicly that fighting with friends is the last damn thing I want to do, or see, right now.

So unless you're being, like, a gamer douchebag or something, the White Flag Of Plushistan currently flies over my castle and I probably just want to give you a hug.

You know what I need to do one of these days?

FIGURE OUT WHO THE FUCK YOU ARE.

My social circle regrew so fast-- and we all change names so much because we're goddamned furries and kobolds & whatnot-- I have completely lost track of who's who.

It's got to the point where I'm often scared of pissing someone off by communicating with the "wrong" person, because everyone assumes I know who the fuck else that person is. >_>;;

But I also just feel like a shitty uncle for not knowing the kids. :)

cynicism 

"If you're going through hell, keep going... until the flames consume you. It would save us quite a bit of clean-up." -- more honest Winston Churchill

Bed for me. Now. Before the hoofings start.

honey (cw: trypophobia/insectophobia/goo) 

I don't even want to discuss what I just watched @anthracite do to this GIF, but my mood has certainly improved. c_c;;

i.imgur.com/vSQ9LRj.gifv

Steven Universe spoilers, 150-250 mKf 

"Ugh. Fine. I've got literally nothing else to do."

Well. That was the most honest rallying cry I've heard in my life, and pretty accurate to my own feelings.

I really appreciated that this episode ended on the most minor and ordinary of miracles. Peridot isn't magically rescued from her despair. She's basically just handed a trowel and told "well, then DO something about it."

Yeah, that's about right. Still love you all. Got literally nothing else to do.

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Steven Universe spoilers, 150-250 mKf 

Yeah, it's about like this in here tonight.

Party on, Peridot. I'm pruning out right there with you. awoo.space/media/J-vd8xxxRNfIE

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Steven Universe spoilers, 150-250 mKf 

That was not a good arc to come back to. Driving around with an unserved cell phone, looking for a single bar of service so you can tell if someone even still cares that you're alive and you haven't terminally fucked things up with them, only to find there aren't any messages-- and there probably aren't going to be unless you go make a damn fool out of yourself AGAIN for ANY sign at all-- feels like the entire last year of my life in so many agonizing ways.

self-pity/honesty, 150-250 milliKafkas 

I miss so many fucking people. I don't even know what to do to fix any of it. I just want to jump into a storage tube and come out when things are better. Or do nothing but snack and watch TV until (a) humanity gets its shit together (b) I'm not terrified of my own friends (c) the apocalypse starts.

I'll be okay. This is just a mood and I just needed to dump it somewhere. But it's been a bit too long since the opposite moods have been available. :|

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self-pity/honesty, 150-250 milliKafkas 

Now I'm just feeling like a big pyre of disillusionment. Let's throw some Steven Universe on that fire and make it as much worse as possible, shall we? :p

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self-pity/honesty, 150-250 milliKafkas 

Tried going to cafe. Ended up wanting to just see everybody I came across just *die* in a wave of concentrated misanthropy. (Kicked off perhaps by the ultra-nosy guy who wanted to be Bus Stop Friends a little too badly.) Decided I had better steer myself home. Wasted entire day sleeping.

Endured a tidal wave, self-conjured, of bad thoughts about how much things have deteriorated with my old friends-- both between me and them, and them and others.

100-120 milliKafkas 

*stares through frosted glass cabinet at the Emergency Cheesecake*

*picks up small silver hammer next to cabinet and ponders something gravely*

*sighs*

*leaves hammer dangling on its chain and goes to curl up with a fox plushie for a few hours instead*

low-grade depression (~50-70 milliKafkas) 

Meh. I'm just tired. I'm not even necessarily unhappy, just deeply listless, unmotivated, and incredibly difficult to impress. Feeling so burnt out, if you tapped me, I'd fall apart like a cartoon coyote holding the charred remains of an ACME crate.

I'm enjoying it in a way. No motivation means nothing is currently in crisis mode. The fire ALREADY happened. It's out now. I'm just not quite sure why I didn't come back on-model in the next scene.

Dragons can be agonizingly difficult to read emotionally, and I'm pretty sure she's going to break down and eat me one of these mornings, but damned if Peg isn't the cutest thing with >10 hit dice sometimes.

reddit 

I just returned from a Reddit conversation in which I learned one and only one thing: I have a previously unconscious prejudice against people whose usernames contain any variation of the word "Malkavian."

profoundly unhealthy-looking food 

This is what I mean when I say I love-hate my job. I'm effectively getting paid to research European pancake taxonomy, so we can make a tight category call. I ran into these in the process, and I can't get them out of my mind now:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kaisersc

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